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My house is stupid

When my house was constructed it was with cutting corners all over the place. Dumb, "rinkydinked", poorly done, half assed (as opposed to what, "whole assed"? I get the concept, but still...) are all words that spring to mind when I think of my house. My friend contributed rinkydinked, btw.

The house is old and I haven't had to spend too much money on improvements over the years. New roof and a new furnace were the major things. There is a whole bunch of smaller things that need work, but I'm not made of money. The Savage Ghost of Murder!!! + sugar, spice and crazy are more inline with what I'm made of, tbh.

I'm not bragging about the sugar and spice part, I have it on good authority that that is what little girls are made of. What this all means is I get aggravated Angry about my house (or garden shed, whatever) quite a lot. Hence this whinging blog post. Ha, you're welcome!

ANYWAY. Back to the house. I had written previously about needing to call a plumber. Clogged line and stuff. So the company I deal with sent out two guys to check out what was what (Elijah and "Kind of a Dick" were their names, according to my boyfriend). So those guys spent five hours working on clearing the pipe to no avail. They suggest I call Roto Rooter since they have some high speed jet thing for clogs and they can record what the inside of the pipe looks like. Roto guy spends four hours working. Turns out that the entire sewage line leading from my house to the street was overgrown and clogged with tree roots. Tree Roots! Okay, stuff like that happens, I guess, but now here is the stupid part. Normal, regular homes have a straight, level sewer pipe. Not my house! This is what I have:

My artistic skills don't really convey that not only is the sewer pipe crooked, it has dips in it. Perhaps because whomever installed it was a dipshit, I don't know. Where does one even find a crooked pipe?! Well, from crooked people who cut corners and half ass everything, apparently.

The dips are a groovy feature that allows gunk to settle in them and contribute to overall clogginess. Along with frickin' tree roots. To repair this garbage requires ripping up my front lawn and installing a whole new (straight!) pipe, one with magic root repelling properties. I have no idea what this would cost. The Roto guy said he can give me a copy of the pipe video to bring to my insurance company. I'm not sure if my home owner's insurance policy covers stupid, but this is for another time.

Oh and just to add salt to the wound, the interior pipes in the cellar need to be replaced. One lucky thing is all the plumbing is located in the back left corner of the house, including the washing machine. So that's something. Meh. The plumbing company will give me an estimate, but it's going to cost around $4,000. Yup.

Here's me:
No, I'm *not* the green guy. I'm the scared woman. Sheesh, you guys...



Wow that is a major plumbing problem. Apparently crooked pipes are quite common in houses of the age of your house. People dug the pipe hole through soft ground. Not sure if pipe damage is covered by homeowner insurance if the problem is long term and not from damage to house. Get someone from homeowners insurance company to come out and look at problem. If they say not covered take them hostage until the company fixes the problem.
Wish I had better news. Let me know what happens.

Problems are mounting up for you kathy, or should that be called blocking up for you, now can you remember me saying one day a while ago that a drill and some weed killer would fix your tree problems, it wont fix your twisted pipe but it would stop the roots from infesting it again, just make sure they're not related to any Triffids.
Home insurance (if you have any) is the first thing to be checked, if they're like our ones they'll try to wriggle out of it, use a friendly tone with them and tell them politely but firmly that they've had your money now its time to pay the piper, Tongue (I just couldn't resist that one).
This is sad but true but a male voice on the line will get more attention from them than a simpering or hysterical woman will do, so, use a commanding woman's tone of voice to get your message across, Ann in the video explains how to do it without shrieking like an old witch.

Failing all that above kathy, if they don't fix it cancel the insurance and get a new policy with someone else that covers you for everything. Meanwhile you're going to have to dig deep in your pockets, or else you could set a go fund me page up or something similar, I'm sure some kind soul would throw a few bucks your way.......

Thanks guys. Between my stupid house and my stupid tooth I'm ready to pull my hair out by the roots. Ahaha roots. Ooh, so punny right there. Tongue
My homeowner's policy is pretty comprehensive and sewage and internal water pipes should be in there somewhere. I'm not doing anything about that mess until springtime anyway.

Moros wrote:

This is sad but true but a male voice on the line will get more attention from them than a simpering or hysterical woman will do, so, use a commanding woman's tone of voice to get your message across, Ann in the video explains how to do it without shrieking like an old witch.

Simpering? Old witch? Dang, son. Dang.


High Five!

omg, C'mon that puppy is so freaking cute! D'aaawww...


What with that tree sustaining itself off the waste water going down your pipes, and being poised to smash your roof in when it dies, or when boughs break, perhaps you should move house. Like this ..?

Somebody actually did that in my neighborhood. A house was built in an area that was structurally unsound and the city ended up moving it about a block away. It was pretty cool to watch.

If I had lots of money I might be tempted to move house that way as well. I'm a pack rat and a whole bunch of stuff has accumulated over the last 20 years. Or maybe I should just build a tree house and be done with it. Smile